Why Do I Bother?

Posted by Nitemice on December 30, 2014
Posted in: Blog Stuff, Discussional. Tagged: . 8 Comments

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As I write this now, I’m already keenly aware that the number of people who will read this is going to be tiny. Much less even is the number of people who will actually read this post all the way to the end. And yet, I’m somehow not deterred. I’m still determined to post. So why do I even bother?

One reason is that I don’t want to break the chain. I’ve been blogging for 3 years now, and while I’ve dropped off from once a week to once a month, I’ve never missed a month. That’s an achievement, and it feels so good to know I’ve maintained it this long. If I miss one now, that’s all lost.
The other reason I don’t want to break the chain is because I know, in my heart of hearts, that the month I don’t post a blog is the month I stop blogging. Once I break that chain, I don’t think I’d have the willpower or momentum to build it up again. It’s happened to me before with other things, and I just can’t bear to let this die too.

Another reason I still bother to blog is because I always hold out hope that, maybe, just maybe, this one will be the one that everybody loves. Maybe this post will be the one that gets picked up by tonnes of people who can relate to it, or derive some sort of help or comfort from it. Maybe this’ll be one that does well. It might even get a comment, or if I’m really lucky, more than one comment!
The majority of hits I get on my blog come from a handful of posts that, mostly, I had no idea would do so well. And that’s the thing. The ones you think are going to be popular practically never are, and the ones you’re not even sure if they’re worth the effort, sometimes turn out to be worth all of it and more.
If you want to know how my blogs been doing, you can check out the fancy 2014 summary stats for yourself.

I’ve been reading a lot of other tech blogs lately, and there are two things I’ve notices:

  1. None of them seem to post to a strict schedule like I do/did, which seems better because it gives you time to mull things over. However, I know the quality of work that a hard deadline has been able to elicit from me in the past, so the schedule is something I’m going to stick with.
  2. They’re not afraid to post shorter blogs. Not every post has to be a full-blown 8-page essay. I think there’s definitely a lesson in that for me.

Anyway, if you’re still reading this, either you’re someone I know, or you’re someone I’d like to, so either way (but particularly the latter) leave a comment below, or contact me through some other means.

Merry Christmas, Happy New Year, Happy New Holden & see you on the other side….

To Infinity and Beyond,
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Nitemice

8 comments on “Why Do I Bother?”

    • Cheers mate! Honestly, the last few years have been a very mixed bag.

      As you may have noticed, I haven’t posted a blog since 2019. I really thought in 2020 I’d have more time on my hands, with the pandemic and working from home and all, but I could just never find the time or motivation. And once I stops writing, exactly like I predicted in this blog, I just lost all momentum and couldn’t get going again.
      I’ve spent a decent amount of time in the ensuing years trying to write specifically album review blogs still. But I feel that this impetus to review new albums by my favourite bands has negatively impacted by ability to enjoy new music, so I’ve kinda even given up on that.
      That’s not to say my life’s been all bad or anything since then. I’ve taken on a bunch of little programming projects, and this year I’ve been on a mission to see (on average) one movie a week in the cinema. I just haven’t been able to find the motivation to start blogging again.

      I also think the internet is a very different place now to what it was when I wrote this post, or even in 2019. Maybe it’s just a perception thing, but it feels much more hostile: everyone has an opinion and feels a need to shout it from the rooftops, and everyone else feels the need to shout back and tell them why they’re wrong. In that sort of climate, I don’t feel like I have much to contribute.
      Of course I have opinions too, but I don’t feel like they’re well form or informed enough for me to push them out into the light, not at least in a timely manner. Maybe I’ve just move down the Dunning–Kruger curve and my (well written, but not well informed) earlier writing makes me feel dumb now, or maybe I’ve just seen enough dumb takes on the internet to not want to contribute to that.

      Anyway, I’m sure you weren’t expecting a mini-essay as a reply to your probably throw-away comment, but when I saw it and read back over this post, it got me thinking. God bless you too.

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